Push buttons to drive and reverse through years.
1941 Mercury Eight
She: "Tell my daughter-in-law that her hat looks like a crow pestering a chicken."
1949 Mercury
He: "What's the matter?"
She: "That bathroom. I can't unsee it."
She: "That bathroom. I can't unsee it."
1950 Mercury
Natalie Wood, James Dean, and Sal Mineo head off for Boy Scout camp
1950 Mercury
He: "Didn't I tell you? We're having a three-way!"
She: "You better mean Skyline."
She: "You better mean Skyline."
1950 Mercury
She: "Would you give me a ride? My son is in juvinal detention with Sal Minio and James Dean."
1951 Mercury
That Christmas, Mother Superior stopped being a nun, and she ran away with the A. B. Dick representative.
1952 Mercury Monterey
The 1952 Mercury, not just a challenge. It fights you every inch of the way.
1954 Mercury Sun Valley
He: "I leave the country for three months and you buy a car with a see-thru top!"
She: "Don't complain, Henry. It's very stylish."
He: "Most foolish thing I've ever seen. I'll need Coppertone just to get to Kiwanis meetings."
She: "Don't complain, Henry. It's very stylish."
He: "Most foolish thing I've ever seen. I'll need Coppertone just to get to Kiwanis meetings."
1957 Mercury Turnpike Cruiser
It was starting to get to Fred. Pedestrians fled every time he tried to park his Mercury.
1958 Mercury
Little girl: "Let's try this again. Our car is traveling 55mph. How fast is the ball going?"
1958 Mercury Colony Park
He: "Hop in kids! Just push aside that steer manure. I've got soil nutrient depletion up at the house."
1958 Mercury Montclair Turnpike Cruiser
He: "I think I've found the Maltese Falcon!"
She: "Right, and I'm Mary Astor. Put it down before we get cursed like the Brady Bunch in Hawaii."
She: "Right, and I'm Mary Astor. Put it down before we get cursed like the Brady Bunch in Hawaii."
1958 Mercury Park Lane
He: "You lot better come with me. Mr. Sullivan wants you for questioning."
They: "What did we do?"
He: "You changed the channel."
They: "What did we do?"
He: "You changed the channel."
1958 Mercury Park Lane
Daughter: "Where does snow come from, Mommy?"
Mother: "Westinghouse."
Mother: "Westinghouse."
1959 Mercury Colony Park
The water was always fine at the Acme Incorporated secretarial pool.
1959 Mercury Park Lane
Woman in passenger seat: "If you think this is roomy, wait until you see the patio that Dan built in the trunk."
1959 Mercury Park Lane Phaeton
He: “Only 119 more payments to go!”
1960 Mercury Montclair
She: "Hurry, Henry! Johnny Strabler is gaining on us!"
Henry: "That's last time we ever go to Hollister, California."
Henry: "That's last time we ever go to Hollister, California."
1961 Mercury
She: "I see that you drive a Mercury!"
He: "Yeah, Mom let me borrow it for the day."
He: "Yeah, Mom let me borrow it for the day."
1961 Mercury Colony Park
Karen: "Chinese lanterns are racist! They're a cultural appropriation by colonial, white supremacists!"
Blanche: "Actually, these are Japanese lanterns. Shut up and enjoy the party."
Blanche: "Actually, these are Japanese lanterns. Shut up and enjoy the party."
1961 Mercury Comet
If Wonder Woman were a blonde.
1961 Mercury Comet
He: "Why did I buy a car named after an icy ball of dust?"
1961 Mercury Meteor
He: "I'm sailing away."
She: "I really hate Styx."
She: "I really hate Styx."
1961 Mercury Meteor 800
She: "But I saw them, Johnny! Hideous technocrats from space who want to scare us to death with statistics and bar graphs! You HAVE to believe me, Johnny!"
1961 Mercury Monterey
Edith let Sylvia enjoy her Montlair moment. Afterwards, pow, the cold, wet splash of revenge.
1961 Mercury Monterey
Daughter: "What's that noise, Mommy?"
Mother:" I think I snagged an Antifa on the muffler."
Mother:" I think I snagged an Antifa on the muffler."
1962 Mercury Comet
He: "I'm coming for you, Poppins."
1962 Mercury Commuter
Claude Daigle's penmanship medal was out of Rhoda's reach, for now. Once she cornered Claude at the lake, Rhoda would take off her tap shoes and start swinging.
1962 Mercury Meteor
He: “So, I’m guessing that Plymouth had a sale on 1961 taillight lenses.”
1962 Mercury Monterey
She: “I forgive you. Few men can afford an Imperial with real gunsight taillights.”
1962 Mercury Montery Colony Park
When the SJW saw that white-privileged male smoking tobacco in his car full of children, she threw herself on the windshield and caused a major accident.
1963 Mercury Monterey Breezeway
Even after reincarnation, Isadora Dunkan tempted fate.
1963 Mercury Montery S-55
He: "Nothing says 'I'm a smoker' quite like a breezeway Mercury."
1964 Mercury
He: "What's the matter?"
She: "I was hoping you'd be more Lincoln than Mercury."
She: "I was hoping you'd be more Lincoln than Mercury."
1964 Mercury
Welcome to California!
1964 Mercury Comet Caliente
She: "Augh, I hate the Sixties. Can we leave?"
1964 Mercury Comet Caliente
Car: "This is what happens when you're designed by Mr. Potato Head."
1964 Mercury Marauder
She: "So that's where babies come from."
1964 Mercury Montclair Marauder
She: "You wouldn't believe the last guy I dated. He drove a Breezeway."
He: "Man, what a square."
1964 Mercury Park Lane
Car: "I'm the bastard child of a gullible '61 Thunderbird and a wayward '64 Ford Galaxie."
1964 Mercury Park Lane Breezeway
She: "Really, a Breezeway? If you were any more square, you'd drive a Rambler."
1964 Mercury Park Lane Breezeway
He: "I'm hep, kitten. Breezeway lets out the toke smoke without harshin' my buzz or tippin' off The Man."
1964 Mercury Park Lane Breezeway
She: "Why can't we have a Chrysler with Airtemp air-conditioning?"
He: "Honey, we agreed. Natural ventilation is the best ventilation."
He: "Honey, we agreed. Natural ventilation is the best ventilation."
1965 Mercury Comet
Woman standing: "Hi, could you give us a ride? I just found Rod Taylor wandering around and I don't want to lose him."
1965 Mercury Montclair
e: "C'mon, baby. Ditch that domestic barge and get yourself a foreign car. All the cool kids are drivin' 'em."
1967 Mercury Cougar
Debbie knew that she could never compete with Doug's Cougar for his love.
1967 Mercury Cougar
Cat: “Call me a pussy again and I rip off your arm.”
1967 Mercury Cougar
Once again, Theresa May failed to exit properly.
1967 Mercury Cougar
Car: “In truth, I am a golden Mustang.”
1968 Mercury Cougar
Cat: "I caught it. I'm keeping it."
1968 Mercury Cougar
She: “I don’t need any man, except now. I need a jump.”
1968 Mercury Cougar XR7
Jim's rock climbing went great until the cougar cub's mother came back.
1968 Mercury Marquis
Apparently, nothing rode like a Mercury.
1968 Mercury Park Lane Brougham
Jack Lord always dressed up as Amelia Earhart for the annual “Hawaii Five-O” Halloween party.
1969 Mercury Cougar
She: “What would Dianna Rigg do?”
1970 Mercury Marquis
He: "The humanities, sweetheart."
She: "The humanities, darling."
She: "The humanities, darling."
1970 Mercury Marquis Brougham
He: “When I’m not an assassin for the CIA, I collect antiques.”
1971 Mercury Cougar
She: "I feed my kitty Antifa flavored Pro Plan by Purina."
1971 Mercury Cougar XR-7
Katrina is a lovely girl, but the litter box odor at her condo is unbearable.
1971 Mercury Marquis
She: "Wow, you drive a Lincoln!"
He: "God, I love blondes."
He: "God, I love blondes."
1971 Mercury Marquis Brougham
If "Toblerone" were an upholstery option.
1971 Mercury Marquis Brougham
"And then there's Maude!"
1971 Mercury Marquis Brougham
He: "Marry me and you will be the Queen of Lincoln-Mercury District Sales."
1973 Mercury Marquis Brougham
Seconds later, their septic tank collapsed and took the Mercury with it.
1974 Mercury Marquis Brougham
Little girl: "Thanks to Stepford, I replaced Mom and Dad with androids!"
1975 Mercury Cougar XR7
She: "Julie Newmar, Lee Meriwether and Eartha Kitt got nothing on me."
1975 Mercury Grand Marquis
She: "Yeah, we killed his first wife. What are ya gonna do about it, punk?"
1975 Mercury Marquis
Mother: "I don't know what the fuss was about. That village-of-the-damned thing worked out for us."
1975 Mercury Marquis Brougham
He: "No, I'm not O. J. Simpson. Why do you ask?"
1975 Mercury Monarch
He: "My wardrobe says Cordoba, but my wallet says Mom's Monarch."
1975 Mercury Monarch Ghia
He: "My paper chase is with the Lincoln-Mercury warranty department."
1977 Mercury Cougar Brougham
Grandma left all the money, and her Cougar, to Billy.
1978 Mercury Cougar XR7
He: "Can you guys hook me up with some Armour All?"
1979 Mercury Capri RS
Not Gary Cole and Not Kate Jackson found lasting happiness through knitwear and pseudo-European performance coupes.
1980 Mercury Cougar XR7
As Bond villains went, housewife Cougar de le Botox wasn't very convincing.
1980 Mercury Monarch Ghia
She: “What the hell is this? I thought Ghia was an Italian, luxury coach builder.”
1982 Mercury Cougar XR-7 LS
Despite her more than adequate shoulder pads, Brenda still got appendicitis.
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